PETA: Ho, Ho, Ho …Oh, No!

As if kids don't have enough to worry about, People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA) updated their GoVeg site to tell them that the milk they're leaving out for Santa is making him impotent. Soy, PETA says, brings joy and is a yummy alternative to leave out for Santa. Perhaps the little ones should leave Santa some of daddy's Viagra instead.

"Hey, kids!" the site says, "Is the milk that you're leaving out for Santa sending his 'North Pole' south? It could be that "Jolly Old Saint Nick" can't get his jollies because milk is bringing him down."

Milk isn't just bad for your mojo, carps PETA, it also causes "hardening of the arteries, osteoporosis, obesity, heart disease and other diseases." No visions of sugar plums will be dancing in the head of any kid who sees this site.